Supporting "Our Forgotten Children" And Seniors with Sara Troy | EP057

Linda Orsini: 00:00:09

Welcome to a call for love. I'm so grateful to have you here. And as Gabby Bernstein says it is by no accident because today I have a very special guest. But first, let me introduce myself, I am Linda, Rossini, your host of a call for love. Because when you're not living in a place of loving kindness, then there is a call for love. And my mission is really to support people and help them create transformation in their relationships between the thoughts and emotions to find peace and calm and awake, your personal power, passion and purpose. And so I am on this mission. And my guests here today, Sara Troy is also on this mission. So Sara, welcome. And first, before you introduce yourself, I want to say thank you, thank you for allowing me to be part of your world, and a part of your mission. So please share with us who you are, and all the great news that you have.

Sara Troy: 00:01:08

Well, I am Sara Troy. And thank you so much for having me, Linda. And the mission that we're talking about here in particular is our forgotten children of which you are a contributing author. And I thank you so much for being that there is the book I haven't got mine yet, folks. But there is the book 15 offers including myself, and it is filled with all sorts of things that we need to be aware of in the raising of our children, educating our children, nurturing our families, supporting our parents, and each chapter is going to give you the challenges that people face, but the solutions that we need to engage a conversation that we need to have, and keep on having until we start seeing the changes have changed. So this all came about from you know, podcasting, I am a professional podcaster they self discovery wisdom.com. And from doing all of these shows, which is near on 12 years now, in June 11 years of my network. In doing all of these shows, I realized that the story needed to continue, that it couldn't just stop at a podcast, and that we needed more information we need so many people are unaware of what parents are going through what teachers are going through. And so many people that I've interviewed at whatever age in their life, we're going back to heal their injured child that was inside of them. And it was Why do they have to go back and heal that child? Why can't we raise the child with that love with that support with that openness on who they really are. So they don't have to go back and repair anything that they step into the light and the gift that they are. So this book came about from podcasting. And it's been a five year project. But last year was I'm going to do it. This is the year the universe said yes. So I went back to all the people I'd interviewed and only two could actually do it. Some had retired, moved on doing something else. And then it was like, Well, where am I going to find the people. And then all of a sudden, I'm interviewing people, when weren't during the interview, you've got to be in the book, because they were perfect for it. And it's like, Thank you universe, for sending me these people. And for them agreed to be a part of it. Because I'm very, very proud of this book, what it represents the conversation that we hope people will have, because the book clubs, where we talked about before when we did the chapter show, have a book club, read a chapter a week, come back and converse about it share. The whole thing about this book is sharing the knowledge for you to care. But it's also a supportive book, not only in the tools and the skills and the tips, but also in the fact that all of the money raised goes to each author's organization that are supporting families and children. So it's a book that keeps on giving. And I'm very, very proud of it. And then go to the orchard of wisdom.org and put in our forgotten children book, all of the authors come up, you click under each person's name and it will take you to their own authors page, where I've done the shows with them where you hear the shows that Linda's done with me. And also the summit we did with all of the authors on it sharing why they said yes to the book and what their chapter is about so I am thrilled to be here thank you and you know my my little baby, forgotten Jordan book, which I feel like a proud mother of is out there and do we well, international best seller so we're very happy to hear

Linda Orsini: 00:04:33

that. Yeah. And it has a beautiful cover. I'm so happy to have I know you're waiting for yours. I have several copies and

Sara Troy: 00:04:43

yeah, I don't know why I think I went to Norway ordered them because obviously it's on my daughter's page. So went in there and ordered from the office thing and apparently that takes longer so I should have ordered one at least just directly but that's okay. It will come when it comes.

Linda Orsini: 00:04:58

The first shall be last The last shall be firms.

Sara Troy: 00:05:03

doesn't stop me from talking about it, that's for sure.

Linda Orsini: 00:05:07

Well, I'm so proud to be chapter 13. And I have shared with it on my website and my social links. And, you know, it's a real honor to be able to speak to our children who are there, some of them are really slipping through the cracks and your character, it all talks about creating awareness and through self exploration, and you have 10 points that you wanted to share. Now, you don't have to share all of them. But if you give us a couple of highlights,

Sara Troy: 00:05:39

I can't remember what I wrote down. It's not in front of me. I'm one of those organic writers that I just write, then, then it's done. So pick a point, and I'll talk about it.

Linda Orsini: 00:05:53

I love that you. It's really succinct, because what you have placed your chapter at the end. And because you have 14 previous authors, I love how you really tie it together, you tie it together with self reflection and compassion and empathy, and community and support. You talk about technology, all those pieces, because our forgotten children is really about how we I interpret it is how we can be more mindful and more present more aware, and purposeful in supporting and nurturing our children. Yes,

Sara Troy: 00:06:33

yes. No matter how they turn up, you know, I actually had wanted to call the chapter I weep for the children of today. And then I thought maybe a bit too dramatic. So I didn't. But I do. I do. You know, when you hearing in the news, it's a bunch of teenagers that come together and just go stab someone to death for the thrill of it. You know, our mother child taking AK seven into a school and just shooting people. When you read that it's like, Oh, my God, have we let our children down? That so disconnected from themselves from society from any form of meaning and life, any form of purpose, that they're desperately seeking something in all the wrong ways. And they feel that we need to look at inclusivity yes, many of our children are different sexual orientations are binary, you know, that binary, I think is, is to tell us that stop looking at each other as his and her, but look at the person of who they are, and the essence of who they're being. We love to label and dictate that we must go under those labels, instead of looking at the very gift that stands before us, and what they have to share. And I think we need to get out of our own way and look at all of our children all as a society and be more inclusive, and not so dictatorial, on what we think we should have. And should be because I don't like that word should. And I certainly don't like people dictating what we need to be, but instead nurture and allow them to discover who they are, what their contribution is, and nurture them along the way. So they feel they have a meaningful purpose, where they feel they're a part of a community, they feel seen and heard. And if we don't give them that, what are we doing, we're raising children that are so disconnected, they're going to go down paths, either meeting with gangs or becoming violent or self harming, or just numb people that are future leaders. And so if we don't engage with them today, we're going to be weeping tomorrow.

Linda Orsini: 00:08:48

You know, when you said that, children are having a hard time identifying with their sexuality. And I think social media, the economy, people socialization, we are interpreting people as their shell, especially children. And I would like to see and I know in this book, and you advocate for this as well, that we see beyond the cell of the child, and really get to nurture and know who they are their true essence, which is a beautiful person, a beautiful soul.

Sara Troy: 00:09:26

You know, I have another all I have 18 different genres and the broken up so people can go to the genres that really appeals to them. And one of them is raising our gifted children. And I believe that every child was born with a gift. Even if they have a challenge. Even if they're differently abled. They're still a gift because they're here to teach us. They're here to teach us stop looking at what I can't do. But look at the essence of who I really am from the inside out. We've been so busy looking at each other from the outside in If we don't take those eyes and look at it from the inside out, we also don't know how to present ourselves from the inside out. Because we're so busy trying to fit into this box, this persona, that society has dictated that we fit into which we are not meant to fit into a drawer. There are no boxes, folks. Right? Your, your boxes, we put your shoes in there. That's it. We don't belong in boxes.

Linda Orsini: 00:10:26

No, absolutely not. And we, so I think of adults, as small children inside, you know, a lot of us haven't healed that inner child wound. And you know, what does it have to be people say, Oh, no child wound is so devastating, but really, it's unprocessed emotions, that is no one's fault. So it's what happened to us as a child is not our fault. But it's our responsibility in our adult life to do the healing. And so we heal ourselves. We heal all those around us. And we are better advocates and stewards towards our children. Amen.

Sara Troy: 00:11:03

Absolutely. And I recently wrote my book as well, sir, is self discovery to soul living. And my brother, who's a professional author can did the editing. And he said to me, is it? Gosh, there's a lot of loneliness in your book. And I realized, you know, because I let the book just like I did with my chapter, I let it come out, then I do the editing, and it's done. That's just the way I work. You know, I am now I'm very present in what I need to do in the moment, and then I move on. So I wrote this book, and then it was kind of proverbially on the shelf for a while before I went back and re edited it and, and started reading through it again. And it was quite surprising to me, of what I can reveal to myself and that thread of loneliness, and loneliness. Yes, I was a sickly child in off school for weeks at a time in bed, I've got breakfast, lunch, and dinner, if I had an asthma attack, my mom was there, otherwise, I was on my own. So I had to use my imagination or go stir crazy right from being bed bound. And that obviously, affected my education. Because after 12 years of schooling, I may be completely just six or seven, but not fully. And I realized the loneliness wasn't just because I was alone there. But the loneliness was because I was so different. I did not fit into anybody else's stereotype. And I was very spiritual. I was a reader, right, from a child and intuitive. I would give people some advice that was channeled through me. Can you say that again? No, what do you mean, I don't know, you just needed to hear it. And you know, half the time not understanding of thing. But it did make me separate from others. And I realized that, that loneliness, and even in the sense of the work that I'm doing now, I'm conducting people to the people they need and their self discovery that's going to help them discover themselves and their meaningful purpose and their journey of life. But I am that conductor again. So I think it's something you realize about yourself, when you're willing to take that journey or write it down, or really look at it, that, okay, the lonely child is still there. But instead of feeling lonely, I'm choosing to be alone now. So there's a different way of looking at it. And I think we need to help children in a way to look at, if you're different in the way you think, the way you dress and the way you look in your ethnicity and your sexuality. In economic situation. You've got the rich, and then the poor, look how the poor retreated. And to own who you are, from the inside out, because you're enough, you're enough, you're here for a reason. You are that beautiful instrument, instrument in the orchestra of life. Learn to play your instrument beautifully, then you will join that orchestra with each one of them in their own strength, agreed to play together harmoniously to create a symphony that will transcend. But we need to know our own instrument and our instrument. Somebody else's playing guitar, you play guitar, but how do you play the guitar? It's different to how they play it. All of a gift you've been given and stop worrying about everybody else's opinion.

Linda Orsini: 00:14:21

Well, I think that happens when you really feel connected to who you are, which is not your body, not what you own. And for children, especially and even for adults. We compare ourselves to others and we want to be we want to be included and being separate or different. isn't really comfortable. If you don't if you're not comfortable in your own skin.

Sara Troy: 00:14:50

Let's Yes. Yes, you kind of almost feel like a fraud. You know you're trying to be I think this talk about society. expectation a great deal. Because especially with the internet, and social media, everybody's comparing themselves to other people. And I think comparison is deadly, because it takes you away from yourself. And I think when kids are looking at this, I need to have a million likes to be popular to be counted. You know, I've got to go and do this to get the attention. So I get the likes. And it's interesting, I watched a show last night, which I love, which is Sue Think You Can Dance. And it's all these amateur dancers that go into competition. And doesn't matter what style they're in. At some point, they're going to dance, every style. And it's all about the expression from the inside out and their dance. And I look at that, and I think everybody has their own interpretation of the story, they want to tell through their dance, right? And it's what resonates. Yes, technique may be great, but what resonates with the judges and with us as an audience, as to how we see that dance, how dance makes us feel. And I think, learn to dance to your own tune in life, be that inspiration that someone seeks, stop trying to be somebody else, some expectation, because I'm competing with someone else, because that is only going to let yourself down, and you're with you, to the day you die. So you may as well love yourself. You may as well love what you do, love who you are on your contribution, because then that will carry you through life with joy. And how many people today just do not know how to step into joy.

Linda Orsini: 00:16:40

Yes, and it makes me think of that, quote, it's not exact, but you know, be yourself because everyone else is taken. Exactly. You cannot retreat the other person because it's coming from their energy. And we're all different. But I love how you sit speak to joy, because that's what I talk a lot about, especially in my course and with my clients joy and love being the highest vibrations. And most of us are not working from that place. And when asked me what's the difference between energy and vibration? Vibration is the frequency and the quality. And so are we joyful the odd time? Or are we really stepping and noticing our joy just being here being energy being connected to others? I've

Sara Troy: 00:17:32

met this this different term, you know, levels of joy, you know, wake up, thank you. Gratitude, Joy, I have another day before me. Right, another day of wonderment another day of contribution. And then there's others moments like I've got two baby grandsons. And there's there's moments that they do know, they do something with that kind of joy, the way they warm your heart and just the simplicity of little things they do that bring them such joy that bring you joy. So it's not just get into joy and be happy all the time. There's different types of joy, different types of love, different types of connection. And it's like not one size fits all right? Oh,

Linda Orsini: 00:18:13

for sure. My I think that joy, I know, when things are in flow and quite easy that I'm in alignment and I'm in alignment with joy, a joy comes a lot easier. And really well. How do you feel that we can help instill that in our children?

Sara Troy: 00:18:31

A by being joy. Our children mimic us? Right? They're constantly looking at their parents as guidance, it should discover themselves. So if we step into joy, now, you know what I say that emotions are there for a reason. They're to indicate how you feel. Teach your children to understand why did they feel mad right now? Why do they feel sad right now? Well, what's making you feel so glad right now, and to acknowledge those emotions, so they don't get stuck in the emotion without understanding what that emotion is coming from? Acknowledge it. The same with us. Mommy's having a bad day. Well, mommy's just upset right now. Not anything to do with you. I could do with a hug, that's going to help empower the kids to feel they're a part of healing you to bringing you joy, be inclusive, because it's really, really important that you do. And I think that just be yourself, as you said, everyone else has taken and be yourself of who you are today. And if you're still a work in process, because you've redirected in your life, don't worry about what you're going to be tomorrow. Just worry about who you are today. And it's okay to be vulnerable. It's okay to be flawed. Awesome. Have a floor. It's okay. And you'll end you're letting your children know that it's okay for them to be different to be unique to be themselves. They're enough for who they are. Don't get but your brother doesn't do that. Why can't you do it like your brother? Your brother is Different, right? This is what your brother does. Well, what do you do what you do that well, right? Don't do that comparison, because then there's resentment, and jealousy, and competitiveness. And that can lead to disconnect. So I think it's be the love, be the joy, be the peace. Show them how you are seeking in life, and show them how to seek and recognize life on their journey.

Linda Orsini: 00:20:32

I think that's why I'm such an advocate for you know, I was with children for over 30 years, and now I'm really purposefully supporting the adults, the caregivers, the grandparents, the the teachers, because it begins with us, you know, we can't give a we don't have and it's I love that other quote, don't do what I say do as I do. Yes. So yes, that that example. And of course, social media, with comparison does not help. But we can set healthy boundaries and teach our children to set healthy boundaries.

Sara Troy: 00:21:08

It's understanding that it's, you know, social media is an algorithm. So a we, what we put out is what we're going to attract what we respond to, is what we're going to get back, choose what you respond to, when somebody posts something joyful, or somebody is in need of joy, be there to give them that joy, that support, that kind of algorithm will grow within you. And obviously in the social media as well. So be careful what you see and what you water and what you nurture, because if you're gonna get weeds, you planted them. Right? Absolutely.

Linda Orsini: 00:21:41

They're just like little sponges, learning and yes, off of us. Yes. Yes.

Sara Troy: 00:21:49

And they watch you like a hawk. You know, I, you know, as a grandmother, I've got more time to really be present with my grandchildren to really watch them because I'm not the mother, you know, trying to do 20 million things in one day. When my daughter had her first son, she said to me, Mom, how did you do it with three of you? And I said, I don't know. I just did it. What how do you remember this or that and because they stood out these events, so this thing stood out. Otherwise, it was the humdrum kind of fed, schooled watered this, that united diaper changes and all of that, you're so caught up into the routine of life, that you don't pay attention until something is really kind of extraordinary or totally different. And I think today, because we have brilliant cameras on our phones, I mean, my, my daughter and her husband are constantly catching little videos, or little, you know, photographs, and I've got 1000s of photographs of my grandchildren, my photos, I just keep clicking goes to capture that moment. And I think that is a wonderful way of reminding yourself, go back and revisit those pictures. And just anytime you're feeling down, and like, you know, the joy that they give you or find its way back in, but we can document all of that today. Whereas back in maldo, you know, it was photographs and wait for them to get developed realize you cut somebody's head off. Now it's instant. And that's one beautiful thing about technology is that it is instant, and it can be instantly shared.

Linda Orsini: 00:23:19

Yeah, oh, I do love that. I love that aspect of technology. It's, it's really joyful, because you know, it's actually reduced the distance between people to go away. And I don't have that same missing as people. Because while I have an iPhone, now I can FaceTime them. Or I can whatsapp video. I mean, there's so many ways to be present. And that's really good, even for children to when parents are busy, or they are traveling for work, that they still, you know, kind of get tucked in at night, channel those things, but I loved when we had our discussion, because I was on your podcast, and your channel that we talked about how to really nurture the well being of our children. Yes, and yeah. And again,

Sara Troy: 00:24:09

is that the most important thing to do? Absolutely, you know, it's yes, we feed and clothe and look after the exterior and help them grow. Absolutely. But if we're not nurturing the well being of them, the gifts that they are, the uniqueness that they are and for not allowing ourselves to stop and look at that and and see it and bring it out in them. You know, and then I think we're doing an injustice. It isn't just about feeding and clothing, your kids driving them to school and to events. And just being that that kind of parent that is a huge part of it. But it is about allowing the essence of who they are to grow and come out and say to them, I see you see you, right, it's not about your grade. It's about Your radiance of life, right? That radiance that's there. And I think if we nurture our children in that way, then we will see so much more creativity and so much more, allowing within themselves to trust themselves to be who they are.

Linda Orsini: 00:25:20

And we can nurture that like planting a seed in fertile soil.

Sara Troy: 00:25:23

Yes, on gardeners that soil fertile. I mean, you know, my one grandson is has Down syndrome. And one thing I've learned about him, and again, I don't know about you, but I've done a lot of interviews for people with autism, and parents of autistic children and children themselves that have gone on, and most of the time on incredibly creative people. And they have a focus on their creativity, right, and they have a selection of friends around them. And they just do not have the psyche to put up with any bullet BS. That's why there's circle is tight, and why they don't want to go out. And when that shattered energy out there, I think there's a huge lesson to learn from them. And I look at my gorgeous little, he's 21 in April, and he'll cry when he's hungry, or cry when he's asleep. And when he's not his happy, right? He's so present, do you think because he doesn't harbor anything, he's so in the now. And he's such a joyful little thing and to watch him grow and discover which is going to be slower than his brother because of this. But at the same time, it's to watch those discoveries that he is making. It's absolutely wonderful. We don't know what challenges he's going to face as he grows up. But we know that he counts. And we know that he will be a contributor. And in any which way. Because I think we're all here to contribute. We're all here to be of service to one another. We're all here to make that village strong.

Linda Orsini: 00:26:49

That's beautiful. I really do believe that. And, you know, everyone has a gift or you right? We nurture our talents, instead of seeing what we don't have the cabinet's at half empty? Yes. From the perspective of what we do have. And of course, gratitude is such an important practice for that. Hmm.

Sara Troy: 00:27:09

And is it half empty, because the other half is air? Right? We just don't see the obvious, right. And I think it's, you know, when you're around people to suck your energy dry. And just suddenly, you feel like if a cell phone with no battery anymore, and you plug yourself in, you can't charge up and it's because of where you're at, we need to be around the same vibe, tribe, people, that enhancer energy that keep our energy regenerating. I love stepping into love. as much love as you give out, your heart generator will keep producing more, we can't love enough. Right there is no expiry unless it just keeps generating and generating and generating more. So the more you love, the more you have the ability to love even more.

Linda Orsini: 00:28:01

Your ad I always say that love is like a flame, you know, the flame builds, it doesn't grow. It's not like you can only offer one and then distinguish, yes, a flame grows and grows and grows. If you see in stadiums where they back in the day, they would have their lights, it's just a beautiful thing. So to let your light shine and that is love. Now the book are forgotten children, which I'm so grateful and proud to be part of, and I've been on your show many times. I'm really excited for your new book coming out are well when is the art forgotten seniors coming out?

Sara Troy: 00:28:40

That will be hopefully Christmas, that's when we are going to have another book out in which you will be actually coaching yourself discovery that these are philanthropy books out Forgotten Books that this other one is a paid platform. And coaches will come in and share what they can do to help people on their self discovery. And so that book is about that that will have summits that will have the same type of platform as we're doing here. And again, it's all about profiling the people that are doing the work helping people in their self discovery, right because that's what it's all about. And then I will start off the Forgotten seniors one in the summer with hopes to come out for Christmas and it'd be the same principle you know, summits ask the author the whole Tutti Frutti because I think many cultures revere their seniors for their contribution in life. And the Western culture is let's just put them out to farm and, and I've heard far too many cases of people dying alone. You know, people living alone, I've done many shows on the loneliness of people that are isolated living alone, and they have a kid around the corner that never bothers even to pick up the phone. And I think we you know, we're doing a disservice to our seniors that yes, they may have done some things wrong they wouldn't have Engaging with what they had and what they knew. But would you have the computer, the cell phone, the TV, the everything else that you're taking for granted? If it wasn't for these people that laid the path for you, let's honor and respect their contribution. It is now their time to rest. Let's support that rest.

Linda Orsini: 00:30:16

It's like you have the bookends are forgotten children and are forgotten seniors. Yes,

Sara Troy: 00:30:22

exactly. And then in between the coaching the self discovery of where you are. I mean, libram, I've always got to balance things out.

Linda Orsini: 00:30:33

I think that's why we get along so well, you're right.

Sara Troy: 00:30:38

And it's all about flow, isn't it? You know, life isn't about linear, there is no straight line, you know, we look at our DNA, you look at energy, you look at sound waves, everything has a movement and a flow to it. And I think when we step into that flow, we allow ourselves to grow into, you know, where we need to go. And it's all about that flow, you've been delivering, we don't want our scales to be perfect like this, we just want them to be able to go up and down with a lovely rhythm and be in flow with each other.

Linda Orsini: 00:31:06

Absolutely slow, is the way to go. That

Sara Troy: 00:31:10

is absolutely we

Linda Orsini: 00:31:17

can you tell the listeners where they can get a hold of you. And just, we will include your links in the show notes. But just if you want to share with the listeners here

Sara Troy: 00:31:27

to all the podcasts, and if you wish to be interviewed or you've got somebody you think that would be a great story, or you are looking, you're on your own self discovery, and you are looking for people that can help you along the way start off with a podcast. And it's self discovery. wisdom.com self discovery wisdom.com There's 3500 shows there. If you go to the podcast tag that gives you all of the genres, each banner is a genre. And pick one, there's apropos to you right now. But listen to these podcasts because there's reason I do it is they are sharing their wisdom. They're sharing the expertise and the nuggets and the skills that there for you on your journey of life. And the orchard of wisdom.org is where we have mentorship directory we have the books are forgotten children. But that is the kind of the business platform where all of the other stuff we do, but they're intertwined with each other. And that's where you can find the book and purchase the book, start a book club, start talking about the book, donate a book to your local school or community or something and get this book out there. Because it's really important, we got to keep that conversation going. And people can reach me at self discovery wisdom@gmail.com.

Linda Orsini: 00:32:46

Thank you. And I would like the listeners to know that all the proceeds go to charities, each author has selected charities. So this is really act of giving this this whole, our forgotten children is about giving to our children in every way possible. Really. It's

Sara Troy: 00:33:04

a book that keeps on giving, literally. So it's giving the wisdom, it's giving the community support. And then it is through the money supporting those organizations that are already tirelessly working to support families and children. So it is a book that just keeps on giving. And as a next year will be booked to on Afghan children.

Linda Orsini: 00:33:26

Well, wonderful. Well, thank you, Sarah for joining a call for love. It was because they you again, and I'm sure our our forgotten children will not be forgotten in this show.

Sara Troy: 00:33:40

No. And please, when you go to the orchard of wisdom.org and go to my forgotten children book, you will see Linda's picture there with a little blurb. And under the link, that link will take you to her own office page where we've done all of our shows on the summit show where to buy the book and all the other books that she's been in. That's her own personal page. So please go to that page, listen to the other shows, and support her on the books that she's also in.

Linda Orsini: 00:34:06

Yeah, thank you, sir. Thank you for joining me on my journey. I really appreciate you and just wishing you just so much success in really making your dreams come true and being of service to others. So thank you for being on a call for love.

Sara Troy: 00:34:22

Thank you very much.

Linda Orsini: 00:34:27

Thank you for listening. It would mean so much to me. If you could share this episode with someone you feel could benefit from its message and subscribe to a call for love podcast. To receive new weekly episodes every Tuesday. Head over to global wellness education.com To learn more